It's a long story but a funny one and it happened to me today!
A rather hilarious thing happened to me this morning.
I was in a supermarket and walked past a stand that displayed different gadgets and small gifts for Valentine.
As I like the colour red, my eyes hovered over this stand with a little more attention than usual.
And I saw something that made me grin.
A whole bunch of bells, fire red with the text “Ring for Sex” stamped on in black.
Some other customers were also having a look at the different gadgets so I didn’t feel like picking up this bell to have a closer look. It made me feel a bit too uneasy.
Instead I gazed at a display with valentine cards, took one out I liked and put it in my shopping trolley.
At long last the other people continued shopping and I was alone in the vicinity of these silly bells.
I took one out of the display, grinned some more and decided to buy it.
I gently put it in my trolley, I didn’t want it to make noise and attract attention.
I shoved it under some other items in the trolley as it felt so ridiculous to shop around with a sexy bell on top of my groceries.
After a while I had finished buying what I needed and went to the check-out.
As it was still early in the morning there weren’t too many customers queuing so I thought there wouldn’t be too many to come and stand behind me. What with that silly bell and all….
But I was wrong. I was still waiting and soon I saw 3 or 4 more customers standing behind me.
When there was room I started putting my groceries and other stuff on the conveyor-belt for the cashier.
Again I stuffed the bell gently, I really didn’t want it to ring, underneath some other items and waited for it to be my turn.
Finally the cashier started scanning my shopping and found the little fire red bell…..
“Oh”, she exclaimed, “it doesn’t have a label… I can’t scan it..."
Here we go, I thought to myself...
She took the phone off the hook and dialled a number.
To a shop assistant on the other end of the line she said she had an item she couldn’t scan…. She said, rather loudly and with a smile, it concerned a red bell with the text “ring for sex” written on it.
“Oh yes”, I thought, “why not just yell it over the intercom for all to hear???!!!”
The words were out though and the customers queuing behind me grinned a bit. One older woman burst out laughing with a face almost as red as that bell with no price tag on!
The shop assistant couldn’t help apparently as the cashier put down the receiver and started dialling another number…
“Great”, I thought, “soon the whole shop is going to know about my little red bell!”
This time the cashier got no help as the assistant she wanted to call was having a coffee break.
So there we were, the cashier with the red bell in her hands, me grinning stupidly, the woman laughing and the other customers in the queue sniggering like little kids.
“You’re doing this on purpose”, I said smilingly to the cashier. And she rang the bell!!!! She really did!
The laughing woman behind me almost lost it completely now and her husband just stood there looking like a big oaf.
Other customers queuing in other lines also began noticing the fun we were having.
I got to feeling a bit embarrassed and so as not to keep the others waiting until my bell issue was solved, I paid for the rest of my groceries and waited.
The cashier started scanning the items of the husband and wife.
Suddenly she got a call, they did find a price tag for my bell!
She settled the bill for the couple and put my bell on the conveyor-belt behind her. It drifted towards the husband. “Oh yes indeed”, I said, “now you are going to take my bell along?” And finally the husband burst out laughing as well. He took his grocery bag and the couple walked out. It was my turn again.
This time the cashier knew the price but she didn’t know what category to scan it in… so she took the phone again and some other assistant walked over from the information stand. They started deliberating about what to do with it…. Scan it as a party article, a gadget? It sure wasn’t a cooking utensil and they decided to scan it in the “events” category.
Well, it sure was an EVENT!!!! And it cost me 5 Euro!!! But it was such a good laugh I didn’t mind a bit and finally walked out with my red bell on top of my shopping bag!
I came to one decision though… I would never buy slightly naughty stuff in a supermarket again! Next time I'll buy it anonymously on-line!
I wonder what my boyfriend will think when he sees the little red bell…. I think we are in for a big laugh too on February 14th!